We all live in a world where appearance matters a lot to get a good career, a good partner, and lots of attention. In the modern world, beautifying one’s appearance is called “Looks Maxing” (looks maxing). That is, looking good through hair, clothes, and various external things to improve one’s appearance.
There is nothing wrong with that and it has a lot of importance in today’s society. Most people, no matter how hard they work on their appearance. Still don’t get the title of beautiful in society. Well, beauty is subjective and impossible to define, and there is no definition. And the scale of external beauty changes with each era.
But by the standards of the culture and society in which you live. You are not considered normal, obligatory, or beautiful, so I will never blame society to satisfy your ego and my own, and neither will I. I am in favor of grumbling to be accepted. You can’t control society. But I can certainly make you see the other side of the coin by reviewing the benefits I have of being normal or obligatory. You may also wonder what the benefits of not being normal or beautiful can be.
I often tell the story of a crooked, ugly, and seemingly useless tree in Taoism. How the tree, because of its seemingly useless appearance, did not attract the woodcutter’s attention, and over time. It became the center of attention in the village. A sacred tree assumes importance and people come to take vows there.
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How Do People Treat Beautiful People?
Beautiful people often get a lot of attention, all eyes are on them in school/college/university/office, and people pay more attention to their appearance than their nature and temperament. Remember that too much attention is not always good. It often leads to trouble. Do you know if a narcissist looks at your physical beauty and charms you into a target for abuse?
People who are liked just because of their looks, their identity revolves around their appearance which changes with time. You can’t stay young and beautiful forever. Not being beautiful means less attention and peace in life.
Consider yourself one of those lucky people who get the chance to work on their “personality” because you know that you are not gifted by nature in terms of appearance. Intelligence, conversation, knowledge, a sense of humor, and a kind and humble personality attract people, and the advantage of all these qualities is that it does not change over time like outward appearance.
People usually like to connect with beautiful people to make their own personalized look better and to have a chance to improve their self-esteem for a while by sharing the most perfect pictures on social media. The real story behind the beautiful photos is often something else.
People who are interested in you because of your personality are definitely a deep and lasting and genuine interest that exposes us to deep and meaningful relationships. Working on personality is a lot of hard work. But a man with an imposing figure can be more charming and attractive than any handsome man with a good personality.
You have less attention span and more “time” than beautiful people. Because everyone wants access to beautiful people. They have a lot of choices. And these excessive opportunities of choice are called the “Paradox of Choice” in which choosing from many people becomes painful for you and you do not feel happy or satisfied with your choice. Since we have less attention and more time. We can use that time to our advantage. By focusing on studies, reading books, learning a skill, focusing on business, and performing well at jobs. We can make better use of our more time and less attention.
It is very possible that your future will be brighter and more successful than beautiful people. By focusing on your personality and your goals and not lining up people behind you. You can achieve a lot of good in life. And why not just financial success, by doing something good and meaningful you can make good and deep connections with many people. Psychologists say that generosity and kindness bring happiness to a person. We all feel good when we help someone. We feel that there is a purpose to our existence in this world and for that you don’t need to look beautiful. Were those people who left a profound impact on the world beautiful? no way.
Many people will probably not agree with me (not necessarily agree), and many people will say that their experience has been very bitter with people. And this is the truth and we all face this bitterness and discrimination.
Who has been and remains?
Epictetus (Epictetus) says that considering the matters that are in your control, you should not waste energy on what is not in your control. You cannot stop people from discriminating, but how do you accept yourself and find opportunities for yourself in your flaws (only in the eyes of society. Which are not necessarily your flaws) then you are oppressed. Not (victim) but warrior (warrior)! I don’t know about you all. But I believe in the Yudha mentality more than the victim (of course you may disagree with me).
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Source: Unattractiveness – Wikipedia